tools explained

fixitman04

fixer of all things !!
Sep 18, 2008
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Tools Explained

DRILL PRESS: A tall upright machine useful for suddenly snatching flat metal bar stock out of your hands so that it smacks you in the chest and flings your beer across the room, denting the freshly-painted project which you had carefully set in the corner where nothing could get to it.

WIRE WHEEL: Cleans paint off bolts and then throws them somewhere under the workbench with the speed of light . Also removes fingerprints and hard-earned calluses from fingers in about the time it takes you to say, 'Oh sh--!'

SKIL SAW: A portable cutting tool used to make studs too short.

PLIERS: Used to round off bolt heads. Sometimes used in the creation of blood-blisters.

BELT SANDER: An electric sanding tool commonly used to convert minor touch-up jobs into major refinishing jobs.

HACKSAW: One of a family of cutting tools built on the Ouija board principle... It transforms human energy into a crooked, unpredictable motion, and the more you attempt to influence its course, the more dismal your future becomes.

VISE-GRIPS: Generally used after pliers to completely round off bolt heads. If nothing else is available, they can also be used to transfer intense welding heat to the palm of your hand.

OXYACETYLENE TORCH: Used almost entirely for lighting various flammable objects in your shop on fire. Also handy for igniting the grease inside the wheel hub out of which you want to remove a bearing race.

TABLE SAW: A large stationary power tool commonly used to launch wood projectiles for testing wall integrity.

HYDRAULIC FLOOR JACK: Used for lowering an automobile to the ground after you have installed your new brake shoes, trapping the jack handle firmly under the bumper.

BAND SAW: A large stationary power saw primarily used by most shops to cut good aluminum sheet into smaller pieces that more easily fit into the trash can after you cut on the inside of the line instead of the outside edge.

TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST: A tool for testing the maximum tensile strength of everything you forgot to disconnect.

PHILLIPS SCREWDRIVER: Normally used to stab the vacuum seals under lids or for opening old-style paper-and-tin oil cans and splashing oil on your shirt; but can also be used, as the name implies, to strip out Phillips screw heads.

STRAIGHT SCREWDRIVER: A tool for opening paint cans. Sometimes used to convert common slotted screws into non-removable screws and butchering your palms.

PRY BAR: A tool used to crumple the metal surrounding that clip or bracket you needed to remove in order to replace a 50 cent part.

HOSE CUTTER: A tool used to make hoses too short.

HAMMER: Originally employed as a weapon of war, the hammer nowadays is used as a kind of divining rod to locate the most expensive parts adjacent the object we are trying to hit.

UTILITY KNIFE: Used to open and slice through the contents of cardboard cartons delivered to your front door; works particularly well on contents such as seats, vinyl records, liquids in plastic bottles, collector magazines, refund checks, and rubber or plastic parts. Especially useful for slicing work clothes, but only while in use.

SON-OF-A-BITCH TOOL: (A personal favorite!) Any handy tool that you grab and throw across the garage while yelling 'Son of a BITCH!' at the top of your lungs. It is also, most often, the next tool that you will need.

Hope you found this informative.:icon_bigg
 

Supracentral

Active Member
Mar 30, 2005
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fixitman04;1821830 said:
SON-OF-A-BITCH TOOL: (A personal favorite!) Any handy tool that you grab and throw across the garage while yelling 'Son of a BITCH!' at the top of your lungs. It is also, most often, the next tool that you will need.

This is by far my favorite tool. I used it several times last weekend after rounding off a 1/2 dozen rusty exhaust bolts...
 

IBoughtASupra

New Member
Mar 10, 2009
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The best tool I have bought is this....


ToyoValve Tool. Makes doing valve deals on a motor go super quick. You can change a valve seal, springs, retainers and valve spring seats in less than two hours and that's taking your time!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eGHvQe5Ml8k


a68989f4-7726-fcb6.jpg
 

IndigoMKII

New Member
May 9, 2011
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Madison, Virginia
IBoughtASupra;1821838 said:
The best tool I have bought is this....


ToyoValve Tool. Makes doing valve deals on a motor go super quick. You can change a valve seal, springs, retainers and valve spring seats in less than two hours and that's taking your time!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eGHvQe5Ml8k


a68989f4-7726-fcb6.jpg

Oh I see this tool being painful too.. Too stiff a valve spring and your hand slips, mashing your pinky into the top of a freshly built head.
 

IBoughtASupra

New Member
Mar 10, 2009
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That's how it looks but when you are using it, the only way it will slip is if you are not griping the tool or you did not position the keepers and retainers properly.

Those springs are GSC springs, trust me, they are stiff. I used the old Blue Point overhead tool to put them in and my back was hurting. You had to push down, make sure the keepers go into place with the other hand and then release slowly so they stay in place as sometimes one keeper is in place and the other is crooked.

Using this tool on the same GSC and BC springs, it made me LOL at how easy it was with barely any strain. The bore on the big end has a machined hole where the lower piece fits into. It's so close that if a piece of dirt gets on the bottom piece, it won't slip onto the big end. Talk about tight. :ugh:

After its in, it create a spring like action with the upper and lower parts without any real spring.
 

Suprapowaz!(2)

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Apr 10, 2006
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You forgot about the good 'ole BFH! Usual used right after the SON-OF-A-BITCH TOOL is throw across the room.

I love the TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST. It's really amazing when yanking an engine out the whole car starts to rise up. Then you find it is something you forgot to disconnect. Ain't that the truth.
 

GrimJack

Administrator
Dec 31, 1969
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idriders.com
Supracentral;1821833 said:
This is by far my favorite tool. I used it several times last weekend after rounding off a 1/2 dozen rusty exhaust bolts...
I just ran into the same problem working on my brother-in-law's POS Sunfire. Had to replace the exhaust, but the old bolts had decided that too many heat / cold cycles meant they should not only rust all the corners off the bolt heads, but weld themselves to the threads. There were three problem bolts, two of which I eventually got off by snapping the heads. Then I ground them flat and showed my brother-in-law how to use cobalt bits to drill out the rest ... while lying on his back under the car, of course.
 

kotu100

Active Member
Nov 23, 2006
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Easton, Ma
IndigoMKII;1821841 said:
Oh I see this tool being painful too.. Too stiff a valve spring and your hand slips, mashing your pinky into the top of a freshly built head.
yeaaaaaah i've done that, my homemade valve tool quickly turned into a son-of-a-bitch tool....
 

fixitman04

fixer of all things !!
Sep 18, 2008
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north dakota
wish i could take credit for this... copy'n'pasted from an email

my favorite is the table saw... works real good with a dado blade and ptfe teflon...
 

veedubin

Official SM Decals
flight doc89;1821898 said:
Also shown to be effective in burning out lightbulbs when you drop it, generally when you need it most.
That is what you call a trouble light or drop light. And the bulbs only blow out when you have no more left and no car to go get more. When this happens you reach for the depleted battery holder. Once establishing it wont help, you turn that into the SOB tool...

:banghead:


Sent from my LG-P504
 

fixitman04

fixer of all things !!
Sep 18, 2008
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0
16
north dakota
flight doc89;1821898 said:
Dont forget this one: Flash Light - Storage device for depleted batteries. Also shown to be effective in burning out lightbulbs when you drop it, generally when you need it most.
no kidding about the dropping part... i used to do vol. search and rescue work as a dog handler. we all got brand new maglights and were required to carry led bulbs in both positions...(spare and use) after another handler dropped his light, breaking both bulbs... he broke his ankle trying to walk out with no flaslight...hence the new rule
 

Supracentral

Active Member
Mar 30, 2005
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Suprapowaz!(2);1821871 said:
I love the TWO-TON ENGINE HOIST. It's really amazing when yanking an engine out the whole car starts to rise up. Then you find it is something you forgot to disconnect. Ain't that the truth.

Typical Toyota overengineering. I can say with pride that the fuel lines in the MKIV are strong enough to lift the car...

GrimJack;1821873 said:
Then I ground them flat and showed my brother-in-law how to use cobalt bits to drill out the rest ... while lying on his back under the car, of course.

I did it with a zizz wheel on a cordless Dremel. That little bastard ate through those things pretty well.

IJ.;1821909 said:
Been here about 10 years and I still don't understand a lot of the tools that join

Settle down old man, don't get your pacemaker all fired up!