ever had a real asshole moment?
- Thread starter gaboonviper85
- Start date
IJ.;1153925 said:How I am here is how I am
I honestly don't believe your asshole.... Blunt yeah, but your a "no bullshit" kinda guy.
But I would like storytime of when IJ did infact do something he felt bad for...
I think that's what makes me an asshole I can't remember the last time I felt bad over something I'd done/said. (I'm generally pretty antisocial and have a low fuckhead tolerence threshold)
gym class in gr.10 everyone was crowding around 1 of our friends and she was crying
and I asked what's up? some one said she's sick and I was like why's everyone crying its not like she has cancer they stop and look at me. "she just got back from the doctors they diagnosed her with Cancer..." Felt like such an ass hole for saying it. A week later they told me the doctor mis-diagnosed and it was just a cold or something?! Made me feel a whole lot better but damn...
and I asked what's up? some one said she's sick and I was like why's everyone crying its not like she has cancer they stop and look at me. "she just got back from the doctors they diagnosed her with Cancer..." Felt like such an ass hole for saying it. A week later they told me the doctor mis-diagnosed and it was just a cold or something?! Made me feel a whole lot better but damn...
I don't know if I was being an asshole, but I did feel really really bad one time after I graduated highschool......and it goes like this.
In highschool a friend of mine named Cynthia sat behind me in a few of our classes. She would scratch my back and massage my shoulders during class. She was also dating one of my best friends so we would talk a lot. She was as sweet as anyone could ever be so I wouldn't hurt her feelings for anything in the world. In school she was 5'6" and weighed about 115lbs and was very very pretty. About two years after we graduated, I ran into her at one of our local grocery stores. She was coming out and I was going in and I hadn't seen her for about two years. We stopped and started talking to each other. I noticed she was pregnant and so I asked her when she was due. When's what due, she asks me. That should have been a clue, but my brain wasn't working at the moment, so I said when is your baby due. She said, I'm not pregnant, and me, being the dumbass that I am, reached over and RUBBED her belly and said yes you are, as if she didn't know. She said "Jay, I'm not pregnant!"
When I finally got my size 12 foot out of my mouth, I apologized and made a hasty retreat feeling as low as one person could possibly feel. I doubt I ever forget that moment.
In highschool a friend of mine named Cynthia sat behind me in a few of our classes. She would scratch my back and massage my shoulders during class. She was also dating one of my best friends so we would talk a lot. She was as sweet as anyone could ever be so I wouldn't hurt her feelings for anything in the world. In school she was 5'6" and weighed about 115lbs and was very very pretty. About two years after we graduated, I ran into her at one of our local grocery stores. She was coming out and I was going in and I hadn't seen her for about two years. We stopped and started talking to each other. I noticed she was pregnant and so I asked her when she was due. When's what due, she asks me. That should have been a clue, but my brain wasn't working at the moment, so I said when is your baby due. She said, I'm not pregnant, and me, being the dumbass that I am, reached over and RUBBED her belly and said yes you are, as if she didn't know. She said "Jay, I'm not pregnant!"
When I finally got my size 12 foot out of my mouth, I apologized and made a hasty retreat feeling as low as one person could possibly feel. I doubt I ever forget that moment.
^ It's 'Bama Jay... Why didn't you just see if she was wearing shoes? sheesh...
That story reminds me of something:
That story reminds me of something:
I'll post mine when I get a minute.
*edit*
So the summer before my senior year of highschool. I'm a stud, I got a crotch rocket and my Supra pwnz all. I'm taking summer PE as an elective credit (never been done before as far as the counselor knew...) I was bored and figured it was better than sleeping all day. So I'm going doing my thing and I start talking to the freshmen girls who are taking it. Of course, they all think I'm awesome, yada yada yada, and I start talking to one and getting kinda close to. She was easy to talk to, funny, and laughed at everything I said. So she was my running partner (she was like... 5'8" like 80lbs, I'm 5'9" 225... HARD to keep up with to say the least) so school starts the next year and we're still pretty close friends and she asks for help w/ her math homework and the like, being in Calc, it was EASY stuff. So I start going over to her house once a week or so to help her out w/ her homework, never thinking anything asbout it... Oh, and did I mention I was dating my wife-then girlfriend... had been for 3 years. She was TOTALLY cool w/ it. I didn't hide it from her, didn't even try. ANYWAY... I end up taking the girl out for lunch on a saturday, she complained that she wasn't doing anything for her B-day so I just brought it up... plus she liked the Chinese place my wife hated. So we go, and sit and talk for quite awhile and then I drop her off at her place... I didn't even get out of the car or anything. So a few days pass, ahvent heard from her, a couple weeks, still nothing. I call her up and ask whats up and she just starts crying and hangs up. So I talk to her friends and they are all like 'wtf? she's totally in love with you. yada yada'
so I end up talking to her about it a few days and everything is cool... then one day out of the blue someone blindsides her asking wtf she was thinking thinking that I was gonna leave my wife for her.. she got pissed, took off and I havent talked to her since.
I never gave any hint that I was into her, or so I thought. So I talked to my wife about it and she said 'it must just be your flirtatious attitude' Then it hit me. Holy Shit. I just played this freshman girl... WTF?! Everytime I seen her afterwards, I wanted to go up to her and appologize so bad, I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I just figured she'd gotten over it, moved on... it's what girls do I guess.
Everything worked out. I got married and she is now hotter than hell.... and doesn't have a kid
DAMN IT lol
*edit*
So the summer before my senior year of highschool. I'm a stud, I got a crotch rocket and my Supra pwnz all. I'm taking summer PE as an elective credit (never been done before as far as the counselor knew...) I was bored and figured it was better than sleeping all day. So I'm going doing my thing and I start talking to the freshmen girls who are taking it. Of course, they all think I'm awesome, yada yada yada, and I start talking to one and getting kinda close to. She was easy to talk to, funny, and laughed at everything I said. So she was my running partner (she was like... 5'8" like 80lbs, I'm 5'9" 225... HARD to keep up with to say the least) so school starts the next year and we're still pretty close friends and she asks for help w/ her math homework and the like, being in Calc, it was EASY stuff. So I start going over to her house once a week or so to help her out w/ her homework, never thinking anything asbout it... Oh, and did I mention I was dating my wife-then girlfriend... had been for 3 years. She was TOTALLY cool w/ it. I didn't hide it from her, didn't even try. ANYWAY... I end up taking the girl out for lunch on a saturday, she complained that she wasn't doing anything for her B-day so I just brought it up... plus she liked the Chinese place my wife hated. So we go, and sit and talk for quite awhile and then I drop her off at her place... I didn't even get out of the car or anything. So a few days pass, ahvent heard from her, a couple weeks, still nothing. I call her up and ask whats up and she just starts crying and hangs up. So I talk to her friends and they are all like 'wtf? she's totally in love with you. yada yada'
so I end up talking to her about it a few days and everything is cool... then one day out of the blue someone blindsides her asking wtf she was thinking thinking that I was gonna leave my wife for her.. she got pissed, took off and I havent talked to her since.
I never gave any hint that I was into her, or so I thought. So I talked to my wife about it and she said 'it must just be your flirtatious attitude' Then it hit me. Holy Shit. I just played this freshman girl... WTF?! Everytime I seen her afterwards, I wanted to go up to her and appologize so bad, I just couldn't bring myself to do it. I just figured she'd gotten over it, moved on... it's what girls do I guess.
Everything worked out. I got married and she is now hotter than hell.... and doesn't have a kid
DAMN IT lol
Last edited:
so Saturday night i had all my friends in my car and we strole down to the movie theatre and to my surprise the parking lot was COMPLETELY FULL. I mean there werent spots even out in the boonies. Anyways i start going down every isle, and i see this dumb girl in a red volvo just sitting in the aisle with her blinker on to turn left. Im thinking to myself where the hell is she going to park. well as i notice this i see a SUV start to back up and i go Bingo!! front row spot right here!! so i turn on my blinker and the bitch just looks at me like ur kidding me right? first off, shes 5 spots ahead of the SUV, shes stopping traffic, and she has her blinker on in the wrong direction so im thinking to myself there's no way she can think its hers. So the SUV pulls out, the girl starts to back up but she cant cause of the traffic she is stopping so i just squeeze myself in and totally nabbed the spot.
Oh but is gets better...the girl gets out of her car, leaves it running blocking traffic and comes over to my window and starts yelling at me. It was priceless. Well the ass that i am i just looked up at her and gave her the deer in the headlights look as if i couldnt understand her. lol she got so pissed and all my friends were pointing and laughing at her the whole time. ROFL. I love being an asshole to people who set themselves up. :biglaugh::sarcasm:
Oh but is gets better...the girl gets out of her car, leaves it running blocking traffic and comes over to my window and starts yelling at me. It was priceless. Well the ass that i am i just looked up at her and gave her the deer in the headlights look as if i couldnt understand her. lol she got so pissed and all my friends were pointing and laughing at her the whole time. ROFL. I love being an asshole to people who set themselves up. :biglaugh::sarcasm:
^ lol
Sounds like my gas station experience here on the north (rich) side of Indianapolis.
it's like 4-5am and I pull in to get gas at a gas station after getting off the interstate. I'm not thinking anything about it and I pull my sti in to the first pump, not seeing the lady that pulled in behind me, pull my little gas door 'thing' and start to get out of the car... I hear a honk and the lady is seriously giving me a 'wtf? pull forward dumbass' look. it's 5am, there is NO ONE ELSE within 1/2 mile of us... PULL INTO ANOTHER SPOT. It wasn't raining, it's not a rough neighborhood and this was the pump under the light, the sun wasn't out and she'd be standing in the blistering Indiana sun... 'f*ck her...' I thought, so I continue getting out and walk back to pump my gas. Lady throws her car in R and pulls up to another pump. I hear her say something like 'stupid asshole' and I just laugh.
F*CK CARMEL, IN
Most people on this side of town can seriously SMB. I remember once going to work on time, and passing a corvette w/ an old guy standing next to it, I didn't have time to stop, so I drove past... well, it just so happens that I forgot my badge and had to go back home to get it (about 15-20 mins from the hospital one way) and the guy is still standing there pacing going 'wtf?' pulling his hair out. So I go home, get my badge and he's still there... I couldn't in all good conscience drive by without stopping. Turns out the guy had a blowout on the way to the dealership to fix a 'weird vibration in the back of the car' (bad tire, I assume). He asks to use my cellphone and, anyone who knows me should 'lol, I forgot it at home. He thanks me for stopping and says hopefully someone else would stop. I ask where he was headed, it was probably 15 mins in good traffic out of my way... So I offer to drive him there on my way back. So I get to talking to the guy, turns out he had been standing there for almost 90 minutes waiting for someone to pull over to help him. WTF?! it'd be different it was a young kid wearing a trenchcoat and a skimask, but the guy didn't look like he could take a 5 year old. Also, the people honk/flip off/cussout anyone who lets another car into line... people up here are just too damn busy/important to help anyone out.
Sounds like my gas station experience here on the north (rich) side of Indianapolis.
it's like 4-5am and I pull in to get gas at a gas station after getting off the interstate. I'm not thinking anything about it and I pull my sti in to the first pump, not seeing the lady that pulled in behind me, pull my little gas door 'thing' and start to get out of the car... I hear a honk and the lady is seriously giving me a 'wtf? pull forward dumbass' look. it's 5am, there is NO ONE ELSE within 1/2 mile of us... PULL INTO ANOTHER SPOT. It wasn't raining, it's not a rough neighborhood and this was the pump under the light, the sun wasn't out and she'd be standing in the blistering Indiana sun... 'f*ck her...' I thought, so I continue getting out and walk back to pump my gas. Lady throws her car in R and pulls up to another pump. I hear her say something like 'stupid asshole' and I just laugh.
F*CK CARMEL, IN
Most people on this side of town can seriously SMB. I remember once going to work on time, and passing a corvette w/ an old guy standing next to it, I didn't have time to stop, so I drove past... well, it just so happens that I forgot my badge and had to go back home to get it (about 15-20 mins from the hospital one way) and the guy is still standing there pacing going 'wtf?' pulling his hair out. So I go home, get my badge and he's still there... I couldn't in all good conscience drive by without stopping. Turns out the guy had a blowout on the way to the dealership to fix a 'weird vibration in the back of the car' (bad tire, I assume). He asks to use my cellphone and, anyone who knows me should 'lol, I forgot it at home. He thanks me for stopping and says hopefully someone else would stop. I ask where he was headed, it was probably 15 mins in good traffic out of my way... So I offer to drive him there on my way back. So I get to talking to the guy, turns out he had been standing there for almost 90 minutes waiting for someone to pull over to help him. WTF?! it'd be different it was a young kid wearing a trenchcoat and a skimask, but the guy didn't look like he could take a 5 year old. Also, the people honk/flip off/cussout anyone who lets another car into line... people up here are just too damn busy/important to help anyone out.
LMAO well my moment of being an ass.
One summer many years ago while I was still in high school. I was working at a small time amusement park on the beach. Figure eh 300 weekly after taxes and a free tan why not. Well a few of my friends and my cousin all worked there. We all went to school together and at the time was on the football team as well. All starters all offensive line.
The Tilt O Whirl ride the one that goes round and round with some small banks in it of course with a stationary cart that also spun around in place due to the G's was a pretty puke oriented ride. The ride usually lasts a minute and people were usually spent by then. You can easily tell when you start seeing peoples heads start boggling around like zombie's in a feeding craze.
Anyhow we always had bet's if we could get any riders to "Puke" as you will all over the place. Agian keep in mind the normal ride last atleast a minute!! One Glorious evening I was working inside I noticed a bus of children ages 12-17 get out of this bus. At the time I was working inside so I didn't get an up close shot of anyone. They all went around the Park and slowly made their way to the Tilt O Whirl! My cousin seated all the would be "victim's" as we called customers into the ride and ran up to get a drink told me he was thirsty and bet I couldn't get any puke out of this bunch.
I of course insisted that i would and bet dinner on it. I get down to the Tilt O Whirl and continued to make an Ass of myself by yelling and screaming about how fun of a ride everyone was about to have and the would be "victim's" were cheering me on. So I started the ride. Around the 2 minute marker heads started to bobble so I figure a few more wouldn't hurt. Keeping in mind here I am yellin, screaming, and laughing out loud thru the whole ride. 5 minute marker pops up and thats when I noticed spaghetti fly and here I am Laughing my ass off pretending as if I didn't notice. The girl riding with the boy that puked had it all over her. So I adjusted the speed of the ride just a little more to go a bit faster.
Everytime the girl passed by my stand the back of the cart was facing me and I heard her saying please stop. Of course I pretended to not hear her as a few other cars were screaming in pure fun and excitement and I was yelling and screaming at the sametime. I could smell the puke as it was 100+ degree's outside so I had the hose turned on and started to splash the crowd in each car. Right as I was crossing the 9 minute marker 2 people in 2 different cars had spaghetti flying as well and me along with the rest of the offensive line were just crying in laughter and they all were in tears they laughed so hard.
I finally decided to slow the ride from hell down and stop it. About 7 people covered in puke and it was all over the place. I kept my straight faced acted concerned and cleaned up the ride and the people. As I was helping the "victim's" clean up I then realized that they were "special" as you will say it politely. Thats when I took special concern and started helping out further more. Brought everyone cold water and tended to the people with puke covered all over them. I can honestly say I felt like the biggest ass ever once I figured out I ruined the rest of the day for these children with special needs.
The worst thing about it was my cousin had the camera going and got most of the "money" shots as the offensive line called them and printed them out. When we resumed our senior year of high school a few of them used the pictures and the story in some projects, essay's, and whatever. My coach later found out of the incident that happened not during the school year and punished me with Laps.
Till this day when this is brought up at drunken get togethers from my friends or cousin I still feel like an ass. That day was a defining day in my life and I can honestly say it changed me and helped me look closer at people before I attempt to victimize them.
One summer many years ago while I was still in high school. I was working at a small time amusement park on the beach. Figure eh 300 weekly after taxes and a free tan why not. Well a few of my friends and my cousin all worked there. We all went to school together and at the time was on the football team as well. All starters all offensive line.
The Tilt O Whirl ride the one that goes round and round with some small banks in it of course with a stationary cart that also spun around in place due to the G's was a pretty puke oriented ride. The ride usually lasts a minute and people were usually spent by then. You can easily tell when you start seeing peoples heads start boggling around like zombie's in a feeding craze.
Anyhow we always had bet's if we could get any riders to "Puke" as you will all over the place. Agian keep in mind the normal ride last atleast a minute!! One Glorious evening I was working inside I noticed a bus of children ages 12-17 get out of this bus. At the time I was working inside so I didn't get an up close shot of anyone. They all went around the Park and slowly made their way to the Tilt O Whirl! My cousin seated all the would be "victim's" as we called customers into the ride and ran up to get a drink told me he was thirsty and bet I couldn't get any puke out of this bunch.
I of course insisted that i would and bet dinner on it. I get down to the Tilt O Whirl and continued to make an Ass of myself by yelling and screaming about how fun of a ride everyone was about to have and the would be "victim's" were cheering me on. So I started the ride. Around the 2 minute marker heads started to bobble so I figure a few more wouldn't hurt. Keeping in mind here I am yellin, screaming, and laughing out loud thru the whole ride. 5 minute marker pops up and thats when I noticed spaghetti fly and here I am Laughing my ass off pretending as if I didn't notice. The girl riding with the boy that puked had it all over her. So I adjusted the speed of the ride just a little more to go a bit faster.
Everytime the girl passed by my stand the back of the cart was facing me and I heard her saying please stop. Of course I pretended to not hear her as a few other cars were screaming in pure fun and excitement and I was yelling and screaming at the sametime. I could smell the puke as it was 100+ degree's outside so I had the hose turned on and started to splash the crowd in each car. Right as I was crossing the 9 minute marker 2 people in 2 different cars had spaghetti flying as well and me along with the rest of the offensive line were just crying in laughter and they all were in tears they laughed so hard.
I finally decided to slow the ride from hell down and stop it. About 7 people covered in puke and it was all over the place. I kept my straight faced acted concerned and cleaned up the ride and the people. As I was helping the "victim's" clean up I then realized that they were "special" as you will say it politely. Thats when I took special concern and started helping out further more. Brought everyone cold water and tended to the people with puke covered all over them. I can honestly say I felt like the biggest ass ever once I figured out I ruined the rest of the day for these children with special needs.
The worst thing about it was my cousin had the camera going and got most of the "money" shots as the offensive line called them and printed them out. When we resumed our senior year of high school a few of them used the pictures and the story in some projects, essay's, and whatever. My coach later found out of the incident that happened not during the school year and punished me with Laps.
Till this day when this is brought up at drunken get togethers from my friends or cousin I still feel like an ass. That day was a defining day in my life and I can honestly say it changed me and helped me look closer at people before I attempt to victimize them.