anyone here a JW?

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supra90turbo

shaeff is FTMFW!
Mar 30, 2005
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I'm against JW (not you joel ;) ), so this is fuel for my fire...
These guys are more insane than I thought.....
Thus, My thoughts as I read through.

21. You cannot salute the flag, stand for the national anthem, or own a flag
That's the kind of fucking bullshit that's making this country less free....

14. You are discouraged from attending college
rrright...

29. You cannot be a cheerleader
wtf kind of rule is this? lmao

30. You cannot celebrate any holidays (Christmas, Easter, etc.)
31. You cannot celebrate your birthday
i had a friend who was forced jehova by his mom, but when his parents split, his dad spent like $5,000 on him for his birthday as a massive apology. guess his dad didn't want to be jehova either...

49. A child abuser is reported to Watchtower elders and not the police
wut...

51. You are discouraged from buying a two door car-A "Theocratic" or "spiritually strong" Jehovah's Witness will have a full size car for the door to door work
Jehova's do not approve of Supra's. Sweet.

57. Only officially approved sexual practices are allowed in marriage
Oh that's massive bullshit!

72. You cannot support your country
fantastic news... jackasses!

76. You cannot celebrate Mothers or Fathers day (it may produce pride)
yeah, wouldn't want pride in anything...

98. You cannot participate in a school play
lol... i dont' even know what to say... i mean... why?!? what's the problem there?
 

Puppy Eater

from the rooftop...
Mar 31, 2005
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in your dreams....
51. You are discouraged from buying a two door car-A "Theocratic" or "spiritually strong" Jehovah's Witness will have a full size car for the door to door work
Jehova's do not approve of Supra's. Sweet.

yeah.. thats the first thing i saw.. sucks for them..

i dont really have a problem with anyones religions but.. i always thought jws were a little... different..
 

SupraMario

I think it was the google
Mar 30, 2005
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LOL, these guys are funny, just like most main stream religions, no offence to those who are religious, I just dont beleive in a man made rules tellin me what I need to do to be morally right.

O yea this one is the best
23. You cannot buy girl Scout cookies

THOSE BASTARD FUCKERS, NOT THE GIRL SCOUT COOKIES, I LOVE THE SMOWAs(how u spell it?, its the chocolate coconut ones. mmm)

ninja edit:
Opps, scratch the girl scout cookies, Lets all be mindless piles of dog shit.
14. You are discouraged from attending college

Edit:


WTF is this supposed to mean, he could have?
68. Jesus could have sinned and failed in his mission

LOL


O hell yea.
81. God only speaks through the "Governing Body" in Brooklyn, New York
HE WILL PUT A CAP IN YO ASS.

Damn I'm not getting that sexy wife who cooks and cleans, drives a supra and does it all naked.
91. Only Jehovah's Witness prayers are heard by God
 
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Supracentral

Active Member
Mar 30, 2005
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I only dislike the JW's for one reason.

Showing up at my fucking door...

A note to all people of any religion, not just the JW's:

If I wanted to find Jesus, God, enlightenment, whatever, I'd go looking for it. I wouldn't have to look that far. Please don't bring it to my house, as a .45 to the forehead tends to offend...
 

MDCmotorsports

Offical SM Expert: Turbochargers
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Mar 31, 2005
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Not to defend, but alot of thier beliefs are some what Anti American simply because they feel that Amercia has strayed so far from god.

Now for some of the other things, I think they are off thier rockers.
 

SupraMario

I think it was the google
Mar 30, 2005
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DreamerTheresa said:
I found Jesus!!!!





















...he was behind the couch the whole time!

That was funny, but lets in turn this into a make fun of jesus thread again.
You werent here for that threasa but we lost a good guy because of it. Yes this is OT, but thats like me bashing the USA, and then telling people to get over it, its OT. there is a back button.
 

Joel W.

Just A Jedi
Nov 7, 2005
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I was not going to say this, but one of my Grandmothers is a JW, and I agree with MDC. She is specifically off her rocker and in a rubber room in a state institution now for the past 6 months. (not due to her religious views of course)

She has dis-owned her kids and her grand kids 22 years ago because we see things differently than she does. It's pretty sad in her case and it is her loss imo.

Edit: #47 No chess! Chess is a game of stratedy that make you think of your moves in advance. Better outlaw that one!
 

Jeff Lange

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Mar 29, 2005
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I am a long-time Christian. I think JW's are seriously misinterpreting the Bible, and are essentially brainwashing their followers. It's unbelievable to me what they believe, and I don't understand how they can come up with these ideas, which they reference to specific passaged in the Bible, that don't really say what they're saying.

They're so weird. LOL
 

JustAnotherVictim

Supramania Contributor
6. Heaven is limited only to 144,000 Jehovah's Witnesses
Damn I'm in trouble then.

25. Jesus'second coming occurred in 1914 (only known to Jehovah's Witnesses)
Archduke Franz Ferdinand?

27. If one does not follow the rules of the Watchtower they will be shunned
Oh GOD not the SHUNNED!!!!

52. Men cannot wear beards
By what my pops says I won't have one till I'm 30.

59. You must not own wind-chimes (they are for chasing away evil spirits)*
Wouldn't that be a good thing?

71. Women must submit to Watchtower elders
Is that like sexual talk or something?
 
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