Will probably be single the rest of my life.

gtsfirefighter

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#1
I got married when I was 22, divorced when I was 40. We had been together since we were 18/19. Even though our divorce was very amicable and it was nonetheless, emotionally devastating. We mutually agreed to end it. No cheating, abuse or anything of the sort, we were just done. We get along pretty well now but I can only tolerate her for about 15 minutes and then I begin to look for an "out". She has a new man now and I really like him and he's good to my kids, who are pretty well adjusted.

As for me... Well I'm 44 now and while I like to date occasionally, I have ZERO desire for a relationship. When we got married, I was still living at home with the parents while attending school at night so I went from mom/dad to being married. I had never lived on my own and did my own thing. Well, since being divorced I'm doing that, and loving it. The fact that I don't have to get the ok from someone to do what I want when I want is amazing. I come and go as I please.

I have people ask me all the time why I don't have a girlfriend, or when am I getting married again. My first reaction is wanting to tell them it's none of their effing business but being the nice guy that I am I just tell them I'm pretty damn content with the way things are. I'm not out being a player or manwhore, but when I want some "attention", I go find it and with my occupation as a fireman, it's easy to find.

As for the dating scene. Geez. There are some screwed up women out there. They're either angry and bitter, insecure and clingy, overly religious or living vicariously through their children. A few I've dated have had issues with the fact I get along with my ex. I'm sorry you hate your ex for whatever reason but damn, get over it, move on. My ex is the mother of my children and she's still a part of my life because of that. I tend to focus any hate I have towards her soul sucking cunt of a mother.

So in summary, I will probably be single for the rest of my life. It would take an incredible woman for me to want to get married again. Someone who's ok with me being a car guy/gearhead. Having common interests and friends are important but for her to have her own set of friends and own interests to pursue as well. And no one who professes "God is good" because they hit all the green lights on their way to work. So I stay around the house a lot, piddle with the supra, go out with my friends, and spend as much time with my 13 yr old daughter as I can while she still likes being around me. My 17 year old son is to cool to hang out with me anymore lol. I'm not looking for advice, just venting I guess.
 
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GrimJack

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#2
Nothing wrong with that. Mind you, don't walk away from the perfect woman just because you didn't notice, either. :) There are some damn fine ones out there, they just don't come available all that often.
 

gtsfirefighter

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#3
Nothing wrong with that. Mind you, don't walk away from the perfect woman just because you didn't notice, either. :) There are some damn fine ones out there, they just don't come available all that often.

Well when there has been a woman I've been interested I get the "you're such a good friend" statement. It's like the kiss of death haha. The ones that show interest in me are usually overweight.
 
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S.A. supra

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#8
Never know when you'll me the next girl, so just go about your daily life and it will happen. when I was single I had no interest in getting involved with anyone. They one day a girl 10 years younger then me just up and gave me her number. I didnt think it would go anywhere, but seven years later we are still together. Matter of fact we just got married last month. You just never know.
 

te72

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#9
To add to that, James Bond was a single man, but you never see him fretting over it too much, now do you? ;)

That said, there are good (if not great) girls all over the place. Like Dave mentioned though, it's usually a timing thing. When it's your time, it'll be your time bud. :)
 

suprahero

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#10
I was on my own for 6 years, pretty much resigned to it, been with the current almost 2 years now don't give up hope!
Ken, if there's a woman out there that can put up with Ian's shit.........there's got to be two or three of them out there for you.........:evil2:
 

Grandavi

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#11
Divorced and remarried myself. Can't see it ending because we have different interests so we don't get bored of each other. Plus the kids bind us. If my wife left or (god forbid) passed away (which a lot of my friends have been doing over the past 2 years just out of the blue), I think I would stay single and just find a "friend". Between marriages I had a woman like that. We both wanted to stay single but provided each other for that "significant other" during special events, etc. It worked well, but is tough to do because one usually likes the other more.. lol.

Its usually when you stop worrying about being with someone that you find someone. They just happen. Being alone doesn't have to be lonely.
 

Zumtizzle

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#12
I date crazy women, don't take my advice ever. But, when I first exited my big relationship you were a good help, so I wish you the best. :)
 

bloodasp90

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#13
Well im probably the youngest one of everyone here chiming in, in that im 28 now my self.. yes i am very young, but have gone threw alot too, i lost my Loving Ex three years, two months ago after just having gotten out of six years of the Marine Corps, i too was lost, but you will find your own way, But.. being around a bunch of crazy guys who all enjoy supras, that probably dosnt help any either.. Theres always something out there.. and if not.. BLAZE YOUR OWN PATH AND DONT LOOK BACK! sorry, trying to be funny there..
 

trucker

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#14
Yeah, im late to the party as usual.

dude, we went through our divorces at the same time. Ive only been with my current for only a year and a half now.It took time to find her, and in all honesty, i wasnt looking..she found me.

Just do you. And let other people do the worrying about the next one for you.

...and be grateful it still remains friendly with your ex....mine is in a jar on a shelf in the living room these days

...little strange if you think about it
 

757_supra

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#15
Nothing wrong with staying single. I concluded that my freedom, happiness and peace of mind are some of my most valuable assets, and I don't need a 50 percent-er to help me with that. I'm having more fun and action now than I did in my 20's, if you catch my drift. There are some women out there that test my resolve to stay free and unencumbered, but they soon show their colors, and I quickly lose interest. So my advice is stay single, do your own thing, and make your kids (if you have any) your priority, and have no regrets.
 

suprafreak123

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#17
Dont worry about being single. Just get out there and get dirty "YOLO".........I been single before and it sucks just do the things that make you happy and theres always someone out there.
 

willfish

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#19
whoo....
I see some old profiles on here from a long time ago ....

seems like i did a 180 from this post ..... not to high jack .....

trying not to be a lurker ,.....

WILL
 

honeydew

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#23
Hey, just identified with this post. I'm widowed. I got married, like you, at around 20. We, I, had the greatest life. We were in a car accident down south, someone crossed the median and hit us head on. I'm fine, all fingers and toes but my husband didn't make it. Subsequently, I was widowed at 29.

Not to bore you with the details but I prefer my space now as well. I'd rather have my husband back, but short of that I'm better on my own.

Having said that, people are pretty messed up in any and every generation. The ones who are easy to find are usually very messed up. It takes a bit of digging and standard-altering to find someone great. If they turn out to be romantic or just friendly, it's still worth it. Talk to everyone, you only have one life. We got a bad deal early, you can still dictate what happens later.

Much love and luck.
 

gtsfirefighter

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#24
Hey, just identified with this post. I'm widowed. I got married, like you, at around 20. We, I, had the greatest life. We were in a car accident down south, someone crossed the median and hit us head on. I'm fine, all fingers and toes but my husband didn't make it. Subsequently, I was widowed at 29.

Not to bore you with the details but I prefer my space now as well. I'd rather have my husband back, but short of that I'm better on my own.

Having said that, people are pretty messed up in any and every generation. The ones who are easy to find are usually very messed up. It takes a bit of digging and standard-altering to find someone great. If they turn out to be romantic or just friendly, it's still worth it. Talk to everyone, you only have one life. We got a bad deal early, you can still dictate what happens later.

Much love and luck.
I just saw this. I'm so sorry about your husband. Thank you for the kind words of advice though.
 

RHDSupra89

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#25
Hey, just identified with this post. I'm widowed. I got married, like you, at around 20. We, I, had the greatest life. We were in a car accident down south, someone crossed the median and hit us head on. I'm fine, all fingers and toes but my husband didn't make it. Subsequently, I was widowed at 29.

Not to bore you with the details but I prefer my space now as well. I'd rather have my husband back, but short of that I'm better on my own.

Having said that, people are pretty messed up in any and every generation. The ones who are easy to find are usually very messed up. It takes a bit of digging and standard-altering to find someone great. If they turn out to be romantic or just friendly, it's still worth it. Talk to everyone, you only have one life. We got a bad deal early, you can still dictate what happens later.

Much love and luck.
Thanks for sharing Your very strong!
 

supraamazing10

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#26
Just came across this thread as I was familiarizing myself with this site. I just joined 3 days ago. I couldn't help but comment on this title. I know the feeling. I'm going through some shit right now myself.